That Light in Your Eyes
by Muffy the Dough Slayer
Summary: Songfic, inspired by 'Breathe in Breathe out' by Mat Kearney. Cas shows up during season 6, hurt, and Dean takes care of him and learns a few things about friendship, hugs, and love. Dean/Cas slash. COMPLETE.


Yes...another songfic. Sigh. But I can't help myself! I am suddenly in the mood for these, haha. This one took me about forty-five minutes to write. Ugh. But I love this song! It wound up being harder to write and longer than I would have thought, but oh well. Hope it sounds okay? It takes place during season 6, before Sam gets his soul back.

This song is called 'Breathe in Breathe out' by Mat Kearney. If you want, listen to it while you read this? I don't care, lol, I just like this song. Again, sorry there are no commas between breathe in breathe out, but yeah. Lol. Thanks for reading, and please review!

Don't own anything...grumbles...

Onward!

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**That Light in Your Eyes**

_Inspired by song 'Breathe in Breathe out' by Mat Kearney; takes place during season 6_

**Summary:** Cas shows up in the middle of the night while soulless Sam is out, and Dean takes care of him and learns a little something about friendship and love along the way. Slash.

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_Breathe in breathe out_

_Tell me all of your doubt_

_And everybody bleeds this way_

_Just the same_

Sam was out, as always. Dean had gotten tired of asking where he was, when he was coming, if he even was. It was exhausting worrying about the guy all the time and honestly, he just didn't want to know right now. With the way soulless Sam was acting, he wasn't sure he even wanted him around anymore, and maybe that was terrible to wonder, but it was true. Sighing, he scrubbed a hand over his face and sat heavily on the bed. One bed, because Sam didn't sleep, apparently. He reached somewhat shakily for the whiskey on the bedside table, only to flinch in surprise as the sound of wings flapping interrupted him. He looked to see Castiel standing there, his clothes somewhat shredded, blood seeping out of him.

Dean gasped and jumped to his feet, because he wasn't used to seeing him like this, bloody and rumpled…more so than usual. "Jesus," he breathed, "what happened to you?"

"War," Castiel replied evenly, as he always did. "I don't believe I can…heal myself." He seems confused, which just makes Dean puzzled all the more.

"What do you mean?" he asks, trying to ignore the fear and worry that starts to implant itself within him.

Castiel held out his arm and pulled his sleeve back slowly, as though moving were painful, which made Dean all the more confused. He stepped forward and grabbed Castiel's wrist lightly, turning the arm slightly in his grip as he frowned down at a strange marking, a cross of lines, a symbol he couldn't place…but it had been forcefully carved into the angel's flesh.

"What…? What is this? Who did it?" Dean asked, feeling anger burn within him. Whoever had done this would pay.

"Balthazar," Castiel sighed heavily, and Dean blinked at him, remembering the angel guy they'd seen a while back. "He seems to think that since I seem so 'in' with the 'humans' that I should become like one myself." His air quotes take away a little from what he is saying, but Dean understands.

"But…you're an angel," Dean said, frowning. "You were already human…you're an angel again."

"I know."

"So what is this thing?" He gestured toward the symbol on Castiel's arm.

"It is to hinder my efforts at healing wounds made by normal, human weapons. I am also unable to block out the pain."

"That's…strange," Dean commented, frowning. "So you can't…heal? What do you mean human weapons? Why are you hurt? What happened? How hurt are you?"

Castiel held up his hand to slow the rush of questions. "Balthazar decided to give me a taste of what human pain feels like. He cut me with a knife, not too deep but painfully so. I cannot heal on my own, and to go to my brethren like this…" He bit down on his lower lip and shook his head. "I cannot. I hope you do not mind that I have come to you."

_Breathe in breathe out_

_Move on and break down_

_If everyone goes away_

_I will stay_

Dean blinked at him. "Cas, you're my friend. I know…we may not always see eye to eye, but I'm not just gonna leave you hanging when you need help, okay? It's always okay to come to me. That's what friends are for. Heaven knows you've done so much more for me." He ran his fingers through his hair, sighing. "It was just a regular knife?"

"Yes." Castiel's blue eyes locked onto him like they always did. "Thank you, Dean."

_We push and pull_

_And I fall down sometimes_

"No need to thank me, just let me clean you up, yeah? You should take off your shirt and jacket so I don't get more blood on them or have to cut through them," Dean said as he moved toward the bed and grabbed the first aid kit from his duffel. When he turned back around, Castiel was slowly pulling off his jacket, wincing. Taking pity, Dean moved forward and helped him slide it off. Not a word was spoken as Dean helped him remove his shirt as well. He dropped both items of clothing onto the bed and looked at the wounds, wincing. "Shit, man. Hurt bad?"

Castiel nodded.

The wounds looked superficial but painful. Dean figured Balthazar was capable of such a feat. He was a dick angel, after all. Sighing, he forced Castiel down somewhat. "Sit."

Castiel sat without a word. There was blood dripping down his chest and stomach and Dean didn't like it.

He pulled out a bit of alcohol and dabbed it onto a cloth. "I know we've had our ups and downs, Cas…I know I've screwed up a lot and probably don't deserve it, but you really need to trust me right now, okay?"

Castiel nodded, not even hesitating. Dean swallowed.

_But I'm not letting go_

_You hold the other line_

_Cause there is a light in your eyes_

_In your eyes_

"Okay…this is gonna hurt, so if you want me to stop, just say so." He took in a breath and then touched the cloth to one of the longer cuts that lined his chest. Castiel shifted uneasily, moving his gaze up to Dean's face. Dean paused because, as he'd expected, there was pain held there, but there was also something else…something lighter…a light that…

Was full of trust. He could see trust in Castiel's eyes, and that warmed him immediately. He did his best not to hurt the angel as he continued rubbing at the wounds with the alcohol and cloth.

It was different, having to help Cas. It wasn't a chore, wasn't difficult…well, it was, because he didn't want to hurt him. Sam…when he was stitching Sam up anymore…all he did was wonder if the guy felt anything other than pain, and so maybe sometimes, he was a little rougher than he used to be when helping him. He just wanted Sam to feel _something_, anything, but it wasn't like that with Castiel. With him, Dean was going to be as gentle as possible.

Because he was all Castiel had and Castiel, at the moment, was all he had as well.

_Hold on and hold tight_

_If I'm out of your sight_

_And everything keeps moving on_

_Moving on_

Dean finished cleaning him up and gently wrapped a bandage around his chest, over the cuts, and then sat next to the angel after he was done. Castiel was quiet for a long moment, but then he murmured, "Thank you, Dean."

Dean shrugged. "You've done more for me."

"We are friends," Castiel said, quoting Dean.

Dean smiled slowly. "Yeah, we are."

Castiel hesitated. "Dean…I know you have been angry with me as of late. I know you wish for me to do more for you and Sam, but the truth is that I do not know what to do or how to help the situation. Sam's soul is still in Hell and I don't have a way to get it out. I would if I could. And while I am in Heaven, I do search for a way to help. Even if you can't see me helping…I am."

Dean nodded slowly, feeling warm inside for some reason. "Thank you," he murmured quietly. "That…makes me feel better." And it really did.

"The best advice I can give…is for you to just keep going, moving forward," Castiel told him. "I am certain that eventually you will find the answers you are looking for, even if I can't help."

Dean nodded, smiling at him. "Keep that up, Cas, and people are going to start to think you care."

Castiel frowned. "But I do care."

Dean blinked, as he hadn't been expecting that. He shifted uneasily, not good with touchy-feely moments, and so he averted his gaze elsewhere. In seemingly the same instant, Castiel's hand landed lightly on his shoulder and Dean froze, turning to glance at him slightly.

Before he knew what was happening, Castiel had pulled him forward, crushing him with a hug. He sat perfectly still for a long moment, in shock while his mind screamed at him, and then he brought his arms up and around the angel as well. Normally he would have shoved the person away - but this was Castiel…Cas…and he couldn't. Because unlike everyone else who faked things, Castiel was an angel…and if he hugged him, then that meant he truly cared, that he meant it and it wasn't fake. For some reason, this knowledge made things easier…and tears pricked at Dean's eyes.

_I'm such a damn girl,_ he thought with a sigh, and then lightly shoved away from Castiel. Castiel frowned at him.

"Was I not doing a hug right?" Castiel inquired.

Dean frowned. "Um…what? No, you did it right." He nodded. "I just, uh…" He shifted somewhat uneasily on the bed. "Why…?"

"Why hug you?"

Dean nodded.

"Because I care."

Dean blinked at him. "Uh…" He honestly didn't know what to say to that.

And then before he knew what was happening, Castiel was kissing him.

And God help him, Dean kissed back and _enjoyed_ it.

_Hold on hold tight_

_Make it through another night_

_And every day there comes a song_

_With the dawn_

"Stay," Dean murmured when they pulled apart. "Just…for tonight. I can't…" He wasn't sure how he was feeling. He felt abandoned and alone because of how Sam was behaving lately, and how he'd lost his home with Lisa and Ben. He missed them terribly. But Castiel honestly made things feel better, he had to admit.

The great thing? Castiel didn't even hesitate. "Where else am I going to go?"

"Heaven?" Dean joked.

Castiel shook his head. "My place is with you. It has always been with you."

Dean shifted at those words, not knowing how to respond or react.

Castiel lightly shoved at him. "Lay down, Dean - sleep. I know you haven't been sleeping well lately."

Dean sighed. "Well who can with Sam watching them all night?" he snarked.

Castiel smiled lightly. Dean stared. It wasn't often the angel smiled and he liked it when he did. "But Sam is not here."

"No," Dean agreed, "he's not. But he'll be back."

Castiel paused. "I can tell him to leave, get his own room if you wish to sleep. I will tell him you are helping me."

Dean paused. Thought about it for a moment. Nodded.

"Good - now sleep, Dean. Rest."

Dean lay down and instantly fell into the best sleep he'd had in a long time.

The last thing he heard was Castiel saying, "Things will be better in the morning."

_We push and pull_

_And I fall down sometimes_

_I'm not letting go_

_You hold the other line_

It was nice to know that even after all Dean had done, how much he'd failed Castiel in the past, the angel was still there at his side, had still turned to him in his time of need, just as Dean always turned to Castiel. It was nice to know that it was a two-way street.

_Cause there is a light in your eyes_

_In your eyes_

_There is a light in your eyes_

_In your eyes_

Dean woke during the night to find Castiel resting next to him on the bed. He didn't believe he was asleep, but he was definitely resting. Apparently, whatever Balthazar had done to him had taken a lot out of him. Smiling at the face close to his, Dean closed his eyes again and dreamed of Castiel's warm blue gaze, the light to guide his way back to home, where he was loved and trusted.

_Breathe in and breathe out_

_Breathe in and breathe out_

_Breathe in and breathe out_

_Breathe in and breathe out_

Dean slept soundly through the night, better than he had in a long time, and for the first time in a long time, there were no dreams, just a wonderful silence that left him to his body's exhaustion and mind's tiredness.

_Look left look right_

_To the moon and the night_

_And everything under the stars_

_Is in your arms_

When Dean next awoke, it was morning, but it was still dark out. Yawning, he saw that he was alone in the bed and he quickly sat up, looking around for the angel. Had Castiel left? Frowning, he was about to call out when he felt a hand land lightly on his shoulder. Looking, he saw Castiel standing next to the bed, smiling faintly at him. "You didn't leave," Dean said, smiling back.

"I wouldn't," Castiel said surely. "Not unless I have to."

"But…Heaven…you're an angel. And you're in a war."

Castiel sighed heavily and sat on the bed. "You still don't get it, do you, Dean?"

"Get what?" Dean asked, confused as he frowned and narrowed his eyes in thought. What was there to get?

"_You _are my heaven. My heaven is when I'm with you, when you're…holding me…like you were last night." A faint blush appeared on those pale cheeks.

Dean blinked at him. "You're such a girl, Cassie," he said with a smirk, and then slid his arms around the angel. "But thank you…I think I needed that. Last night. The hug."

Castiel nodded. "I know." He looked at Dean in the eyes like he always did. Their famous staring matches meant something, after all. Who would have thought?

_Cause there is a light in your eyes_

_In your eyes_

_There is a light in your eyes_

_In your eyes_

_There is a light in your eyes_

_In your eyes_

_There is a light in your eyes_

_In your eyes_

Dean sighed, breathing out slowly. "My heaven is with you too," he said, and was a little shocked at the truth of his words. He thought about it for a moment, and yes, it was true. Castiel always knew how to cheer him up, how to keep him on track, always knew just what to say in his own angelic way. It made him smile and he tightened his hold on the angel, still looking into his endless blue eyes.

"I love you," Castiel said suddenly, but his tone was completely serious, like it always was. His eyes brightened, holding in them a certain light that Dean couldn't quite place at first, but then he realized it was love…Castiel's love…for him.

He blinked at the angel. He didn't know what to say, because…He was Dean Winchester. He didn't _do_ love. But yet…looking into those eyes and that special light just for him…it made him grin. "I love you too, angel."

The kiss they shared next was small and short but somewhat more meaningful than any Dean had ever shared with anyone else in the world.

Because his world was here in his arms.

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Well...hope it's not too bad, lol. Thank you for reading, and please review! I live off reviews! Thanks again!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


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